Main Entry: un·as·sist·ed
Function: adjective
1 : not assisted : lacking help
2 : made or performed without an assist
Unassisted birth (also called free birth or unhindered birth) is giving birth at home alone without medical assistance. This means no doctor or midwife is present. No one monitors the women and tells her what to do. She truly gives birth in the way nature intended. Some births may be solo (only the woman is there) or some may be in the company of a partner, spouse, sibling, or friend. The most important thing is that the birth is the woman's job, and she is in control of her birth. Women who choose to have unassisted births view conception, pregnancy, and birth as a sacred, private part of life that comes just as naturally to them as making love.
My Births: Below I share my personal stories of unassisted birth along with very private photos of me giving birth. I believe birth is a deeply private and wonderful life experience. I share these photos to inspire other women, as well as to show that birth does not have to be feared and a woman can be in charge of her own birth.
- Layla Sunday's Unassisted Birth Due to the personal nature of birth this page is currently password protected. Anyone can have access, just ask. Email writeshauna@gmail.com for password if interested. Photos are included of me birthing and catching my own baby!
- Sage's Unassisted Birth 1999 my first unassisted birth. With a short description of Charlotte's 1996 hospital birth.
How I decided to 'do it myself'
When it was time for me to have a second child I figured I would seek the assistance of a midwife. The next thing I knew I was a couple months pregnant and I still hadn't contacted the midwife I had chosen earlier that year. I was taking care of myself and I didn't feel like calling her. She was exactly what I was looking for in a midwife, but I just felt so peaceful and content in my state of pregnancy. Something else was calling me.
That is when I asked myself the question; why can't I give birth by myself? Are women really not capable of catching their own babies? What if I just did it? I'd have no other choice than to catch my baby, you can't tell me a woman would just let her baby fall to the floor. Birth has to happen at some point regardless where you are or who you are with (or not with), right?
I knew something was lacking in my previous birth, a routine hospital birth. It was so standard. So mechanical. I was induced two weeks early despite my wishes to wait until my "due date." I was dilated to 3 they said, so I was "ready." I remember packing for the hospital. Every hour inching by was agony. I walked around the block 10 times trying to make myself contract and go into labor. It didn't phase my body in the least. I was not ready, and my heart of hearts knew it.
The next thing I knew I was in a strange bed, signing forms, strapped to a monitor, IV, and being induced. I had an Epidural, my waters manually broken and an episiotomy. When I was told to, I forcefully pushed for twenty minutes to the "pushing chants" of my "birthing team." The nurses told me I was the greatest pusher. Oh boy was I proud, who would have known I'd be a good pusher? Not I.
Charlotte was born. A nurse pushed on my abdomen to help the placenta come out. (Later I learned that can cause hemorrhage)They cut her cord and then I was left alone, spread eagle in stirrups. I was throwing up from the medications, I had nothing to vomit into so I just leaned over the bed. My bedside phone rang and it was my Aunt. I told her I had the baby but everyone had left me and I had to tell her to hang on so I could throw up some more. After several minutes a nurse came in and wasn't thrlled at my vomiting all over the floor. I said I was sorry. She said nothing back to me. Then my Dr. came back and stitched me up. She told me husbands like it snugger. She sewed me up too tight.
In the nursery my baby was being fed formula. My partner spoke up and said i was a nursing mother. The nurses debated on if I could breastfeed or not. I was eventually wheeled into a small 5' x 5' "private" room in the nursery and told to feed her. I received no help or support at all, but three nurses hovered over me waiting for my failure. I threw up again while feverishly trying to latch her on. She kept wailing. I tearfully handed my lethargic baby girl over and said, "just feed her."
Yes, I KNEW something was lacking in my previous birth. I knew I'd never let anyone or anything come between me and my baby again. I knew there had to be a better way. I KNEW I had just been violated, abused, and neglected. I KNEW I wouldn't let it happen again.
So I pondered this giving birth alone idea a bit more, two weeks went by and I still didn't really have a concrete resolution. I was at a Borders bookstore browsing birth books, not expecting to find anything unconventional, when I saw something that stopped me cold. It was a book titled Unassisted Childbirth by Laura Kaplan Shanley. I read the back three times and couldn't believe my eyes. I think I skipped across the store with it in my hand.
I didn't need to read the book, even though I gobbled up every word in two days. Just knowing that another woman felt the way I did, and did something about it was enough reassurance that I could give birth alone. I got online and did a search of unassisted birth and that's when it really hit me. I was not alone in my thoughts. Many women were giving in to their instincts and beliefs that birth is beautiful, safe, and as completely natural as making love. I wanted very much to trust in my body, in life's process, and in birth.
